Heatwave to continue into next week
The heat wave which has been causing sweaty necks in Ibiza and Formentera since last Friday will probably extend into next week, up to Saturday 11th July.
The official temperature has reached a sweltering 35.6o Celsius in Sant Joan, though readers are routinely reporting 40O+ temperatures on their dashboards and mobiles around the island.
The State Meteorological Agency (AEMET) has issued warnings on the increased risk of forest fires and the high level of UV radiation. The Ministry of Health also requested caution, especially for people who suffer most from the heat, such as children and the elderly. The AEMET urges citizens to stay informed through its website, www.aemet.es, and its official Twitter account.
Vila events to be axed?
Council is fed up with noise
The Ibiza Town council will not authorize any more concerts in the bastion of Santa Llúcia from next week, as reported in a statement. The Festival de Jazz, which will take place from 23 to 25 July, is the last remaining event to be staged in this popular region of Dalt Vila. According to the council, this festival will only be allowed because it is promoted by the council itself, has a long tradition, produces minimal discomfort and is accepted by most residents of the surrounding area.
The council has also investigated events in the other bastion of Sant Pere and Marina Botafoc, and has begun a review of the ordinance that regulates activities in these three municipal spaces. For coming seasons we can expect the council to be more restrictive when granting authorizations.
“We have found that in some cases promoters were organising activities purely for profit and had concerts with music until 2.30 am in the morning. This issue has gotten out of hand,” explained the mayor of Ibiza Town, Rafael Ruiz. It seems that any future licenses granted will insist on the event finishing at midnight, to be well managed and for the volume level to be strictly observed.
Caritas fears social exclusion
Despite the economic improvement, the director of Caritas of Ibiza, Joan Marí and coordinator Gustavo Gomez have stressed that more and more people are at risk of social exclusion on the island.
Caritas is an independently funded help organisation and their 2014 report shows an increase of 6% in the distribution of food to a total of 3,500 people in Ibiza, with more than 29,000 meals being served.
Gomez stressed the need for a change in the economic model to promote a better distribution of wealth. “We all pay our taxes, but then the aid does not reach those middle and lower classes who have been suffering from the crisis for the last five or six years, “said Gomez. “Before the economy, there are people,” he added.
July air strikes
4 hour strikes on July 11th, 12th, 25th and 26th
Ryanair call for EU strike ban
Spanish air traffic controllers are striking again next month as they protest the Enaire airport authority’s decision to punish 61 controllers who walked out and completely shut down Spanish airspace in December 2010.
Strikes will be held on July 11th, 12th, 25th and 26th, lasting four hours per day. Workers have already held partial strikes on June 8th, 10th, 12th and 14th that caused limited disruption due to strict minimum service demands imposed by the Public Works Ministry.
During the June stoppage, a 70% service at all airports was maintained and there were no major incidents that would have resulted in passengers missing their flights.
News of the Spanish air traffic controller strikes and further stoppages by French controllers, was followed by Ryanair launching an online petition to try to force the European Commission to introduce an EU-wide ban on stoppages, like the ones already in place in the US and Italy, where controllers’ rights to strike are very limited.
The website ‘Keep Europe’s Skies Open’ is hoping to collect at least a million signatures in order to place pressure on Brussels. “We want to prevent Europe’s consumers from having their travel plans and holidays cancelled by tiny groups of Air Traffic Control unions going on strike and closing the skies over Europe,” says the low-cost airline.
Ryanair says that since 2009, French controllers have clocked up a total of 39 days of strikes. The last two days of stoppages, which took place in April of this year to protest a raise in the retirement age and a decline in working conditions, forced the cancellation of 3,600 flights.
The petition, which only asks for the name, surname and the country of signers, can be signed as many times as a person wants, and users do not even need to supply a real country.
The Beat Goes On.
Following on from the hugely successful Flower Power Night the Viva Cala Llonga Team’s next event is this Friday 10th July with a night of Mod, Pop, Blues and Rock music, all the best sounds from the 60’s to the present, with The Holics playing live from 9pm on the promenade. There will also be an extra Hippy Market, offering a fabulous range of handmade gifts and souvenirs. Remember our Hiippy market is held every Thursday evening, with live music & more throughout the summer months. Make a note in your diaries as on Monday 27th July there’s a “Dance Extravaganza Night” starting from 8pm. Then on Thursday 30th there’s a “Cinema On The Beach” evening Further info very soon. Viva Cala Llonga!!
Gay Pride Ibiza
Ibiza’s Gay Pride celebrations take place between July 8-12 in various locations on the island. On Saturday July 11, starting at 8pm there’ll be parade through Ibiza Town. Beginning in the Avda. Alcalde Bartomeu de Roselló, continues along Avda. Santa Eulalia, and ends in Ibiza’s port, the LGTB rights parade will include floats from several Ibizan institutions and businesses. At the end of the parade on the port stage there’ll be LGTB rights statements from Kike Sarasola (President of Room Mate Hotels) and his husband and business partner Carlos Marrero, plus a performance by Ibizan singer Rebeka Brown. Music and performances continue until midnight. There’s also lots of daytime parties and club nights throughout the 5 days – more info at:
Confirmed for Friday 17th July so you should have your imagination working as hard as your needle and thread to come up with something special for this year’s workers blowout fancy dress party. See advert for more info.
Es Canar Fiestas
The fiestas in Es Canar are in honour of Saint Christofer, or Sant Cristofol, and have started this week.
On Thursday, July 9th, walk down to the Avenida Punta Arabí and join the Street Party that starts at 6.30pm and will include a water balloon war, musical performances and a fire show.
Jo Exton of the Red Lion contacted us with more details of what sounds a great line up—themed around a superhero water balloon party/war (both sound brilliant), there is also a bevvy of live acts including Harry James hosting and singing, Danny Murphy, the Abba Angels, a Fire Show, Tony Wright singing, the Mardy Depps Trio and our own Carly S as someone fab from Frozen—the mere idea of which will be a welcome tonic in the heatwave.
The following day is the patron saint’s day and the festivities will begin at 10am with the opening of a small exhibition of craft products from Ibiza around the beach promenade in Es Canar. Two hours later, in the town chapel, there will be a mass officiated by the Bishop of Ibiza, Vicente Juan Segura, and sung by the Choir of Sant Carles. After the ceremony there will be parade of carts that will travel the main streets of Es Canar. Those of you who are hungry will still have to wait a bit to taste the traditional dishes of the participants in the Paella Contest, which will put an end to the activities of the morning.
In the evening the festivities will continue with a parade of the Municipal Band of Santa Eulalia which will start at 9pm. Half an hour later the Colla de Sant Carles, offer a ballada pagesa, followed by the concert by local band Morning Drivers – if you like your rock classics well sung you will love these guys!
Finally, at midnight, a fireworks display will put an end to the festivities.
The artist and painter Fernando Lorenzo Bofill returns to Ibiza after a long absence with a new major retrospective. The exhibition runs until July 18th between 10:00-13:30 and 18:00-21:00 at Ibiza Best Photo & Art Gallery (formerly Gallery Altamira) in Av. España, Ibiza Town.
The retrospective exhibition will feature 30 works representing several decades of his career and will also include his work entitled “Easter”, one of the five works selected from more than 150 who represented Spain at the Great Exhibition on Millennium Eve held at the Mall Galleries in London.
The subject matter is purely Ibiza as Bofill explores the nostalgia of the island, which he believes to have been lost with new trends and the fast pace of change.
[email protected] Gallery
From 8pm this Saturday July 11th, sees a ‘fusion’ of twenty artists from around the world, which aims to position Ibiza at the forefront of collaborative art. The exhibition will be based on previous artworks “Zoolandia”, “Garden of Eden” and “Anima4” with contributions from renowned sculptor Ben Foster and also sculptors Claire Fontana and Valérie Marty, along with photographer Bart Herreman and many more. The aim of the exhibition is “to show the public how great artists can join their works in a fresh and casual composition that everyone can appreciate and enjoy.” We’re not sure what to expect, but it will be undoubtedly be interesting!
Carwash @ Pikes
The fabulous disco party that is Carwash returns to Ibiza Rocks House at Pikes again this Friday, July 10. The infamous Carwash duo, Nigel Atkin and Steve Altman will be playing the tunes with special guest Jo Mills and Carwash favourites Andy Bailey, Scott Gray and Lisa Chadderton who are back for another night of ridiculously debaucherous fun.
Get out the sequins and your dancing shoes and prepare to dance the night away.
Entrance is free but you need to be on the guestlist – details here:
Reubens take plunge in Ibiza
The Sunday Times
Billionaire brothers David and Simon Reuben have bought three miles of prime beachfront in Ibiza for £25m, including the Sunset Ashram beach bar and restaurant.
The property tycoons, whose empire stretches from Global Switch data centres to Doncaster racecourse, sealed the purchase of 16m sq ft of land in the southwest of the party island from a Spanish family last week. The deal, carried out through a subsidiary of their Aldersgate Investments company, comprises three plots: Cala Bassa, Cala Conta — home to Sunset Ashram and famous for its views — and Es Penyal.
Ibiza’s authorities are understood to have granted the Gallart Sans family planning permission to redevelop the sites, although it has now lapsed. The Reubens hope to renew it and build a series of luxury seafront developments.
More mega yachts
It isn’t the first time that the super luxury yacht ‘Artic P’ has be seen in Ibiza, but the strange shape continues to arouse the same excitement from onlookers.15 meters wide and 88 meters long, the Australian tycoon Kerry Packer turned this old icebreaker ship (built in Germany in 1969) into a private luxury yacht yet kept the original exterior design and distinctive radio antennas.
The owner rents exclusively to prominent personalities from the business world and celebrities like Tom Cruise and Orlando Bloom. Rumour has it that Mariah Carey is currently on board and enjoying the Ibiza weather.
Fire on boat
Two private yachts responded to a distress signal sent by the boat ‘La Belle Equipe’ off the coast of Cala Jondal after a fire broke out. The fire flared up very fast and within minutes devoured the boat, which was made of fiberglass. Luckily a boat was near at hand.
The ‘Salvamar Markab’ rescued six people and a dog then transferred the survivors to another boat, which dropped them off at Marina Botafoc. The six, all Belgians, and the animal whose nationality has not been confirmed, were unharmed. The Guardia Civil is now investigating the cause of the fire.
Petition for the Calas
The purchase of 144 hectares between Cala Conta and Cala Bassa by British billionaires and property investors, the Reuben Brothers, has generated great concern among certain sectors of Ibiza who believe that the land may be ruined with new construction.
Some citizens have already started a campaign to collect signatures via the online petition portal, Change.org to prevent the development of this piece of coast. The ‘Ibiza says no to the Reuben brothers’ initiative which says that “the natural areas of Ibiza are under threat and are being purchased with only one intention: to make money and more money,” has already collected more than 1,200 signatures.
San Joan Forest Fire
The latest in a spate of forest fires occurred in Sant Joan this week. The fire originated at the KM8 marker on the road leading to Cala de San Vicente, only a few thousand metres from the beach.rapid intervention of firefighters, police and Environment Balearic Institute of Nature (IBANAT) prevented the fire from spreading.
Luckily only 870 square metres of pine trees and junipers were burnt next to the road, according to IBANAT’s official Twitter account, but firemen added that the situation was extremely dangerous and the fire could easily have spread out of control due to hot and windy conditions.
The Guardia Civil will investigate the causes of this new incident, which at the moment are unknown. Residents and tourists alike are asked to be aware of their actions and not to discard lit cigarettes or glass bottles from their car.
The Ibiza Consell has issued a circular to residents and property owners in the Montecristo region of the island asking them to implement new guidelines to avoid a possible plague of tiger mosquitoes.
Scientists at the University of the Balearic Islands (UIB) explain that this invasive species has spawned in a trap placed in this area, but not in the other 29 spread over the rest of the island. The number of eggs is very low, so experts believe that the presence of tiger mosquitos is currently minimal. Nevertheless, the Consell and the town of San Antonio are taking measures to prevent permanent settlement.
(that doesn’t involve Andy Townsend or Loose Women)
There were queues of dozens of vehicles and at least fifty individuals waiting to be served by a single employee just recently at the Vehicle Inspection Station (ITV) of the Consell de Ibiza on the road to Santa Gertrudis.
Rodolfo Escudero, the only member of the team dealing with the public said that there were dozens of owners with their vehicles in two rows waiting to enter one of the two lines, where four mechanics were working hard.
All employees involved in the inspection of vehicles seem to be overworked at this present time, as currently the nearest appointment is mid-to-late January of next year.
Check your tyres!
The Directorate General of Traffic (DGT) has begun a summer campaign to improve road safety by inspecting vehicles at random road blocks set up by the Guardia Civil’s traffic department. Specific attention will be paid to the condition of tires, brakes and lights. The agency explained that the decision was motivated by the 13.2 year-old average age of vehicles on Spanish roads and the reduction in vehicle maintenance due to the economic crisis.
Compared to cars up to four years old, the risk of death is
- 6 times higher in passenger cars 10-14 years old
- 2 times higher for passenger cars 15-19 years old.
Café Del Mar burgled
Last Sunday night 30,000 euros was stolen from the offices of Café del Mar in San Antonio. On Monday morning local managers discovered the incident and reported it to the authorities. Apparently the thieves forced one of the windows of the building and managed to open the safe with a thermal lance.
Smokers respecting ban
The Balearic Islands have less people smoking illegally in bars and restaurants than most other regions of Spain. According to the Health Barometer 2014, the islands scored 8.57 points which is significantly above the Spanish average of 8.10 points. The region of Asturias (9.22) is the most law-abiding and the region of Melilla (6.15) seems happy to light up anywhere.
The Balearics do not perform so well when it comes to smoking in hospitals and schools, and is below the Spanish average with a score of 5.09. Melilla once again has the least socially aware smokers with a dismal 3.22.
Romani amare Formentera
A total of 23 students from 13 different European universities are currently participating in the archaeological excavation of the ancient Roman fortress of Can Blai in Formentera. The excavation is taking place between 1st and 30th July, and is titled “Can Blai: an imperial outpost coastline under surveillance in the western Mediterranean.” The dig, which strives to allow students to receive practical training on archaeological research, is focussing on the first decade of the fourth century when the Romans put 80 men on this island outpost to monitor and prevent the landing of potential enemies.”
Beach butts not wanted
Innovative initiative to discourage litter
The company that manages the cleaning and waste collection in San Jose, HERBUSA Es Vedra, launches an innovative campaign in Playa d’en Bossa to raise awareness on the importance of maintaining a clean beach environment.
This traveling installation, which consists of enormous figures representing cigarette butts, sunflower seed shells, ice cream sticks and bottle caps, will run until next Monday 8th July and will appear at Playa d’en Bossa, Cala Bassa, Cala Conta, Cala Tarida, Cala Vadella, Cala d’Hort, Port des Torrent, Cala de Bou, Es Cavallet and Salinas. A spokesman for the organisation explains, “We have wanted to do something very striking to highlight the problem and draw attention to the importance of protecting our environment.”
This is the first time that an activity of this kind has been carried out on the island, and hopes are to surprise tourists and residents who encounter it. The objects will at each beach for between two and eight hours depending on the location and number of people.
According to a study conducted by the company HERBUSA, a substansial amount of cigarette butts and packaging waste are left on beaches particularly during August and September. The initiative hopes to encourage people to take their waste with them when leaving the beach, and also will point out where on the beach residue should be discarded.
Food & Drink
The Padthai Restaurant is a new addition to the abundant culinary options available this year in Santa Eulalia. It is to be found just off the promenade in front of the ferryboat port by the entrance to the town’s marina – at Pasatge Vapor Mallorca 7, to be precise – and has been offering traditional Thai cuisine from the Isan, or northeastern region of Thailand for almost four months now.
This is the cuisine of the more arid Khorat Plateau, which is similar in culture to Laos and influenced by the Khmer cuisine from Cambodia to the south and Vietnamese cuisine to its East. There are still many temple ruins on the plateau from the time of the Khmer Empire, which at its peak between the 11th and 13th Century was the largest pre-industrial urban centre in the world. (i.e. not to be confused with Pol Pot’s murderous Khmer Rouge communists of the late 1970s!)
Guests of the Padthai may well recognize Pancho, the patriarch of the family. He has been in and around the Thai restaurants of the island for 25 years now and has worked all over the island, from Es Canar to San Antonio. Residents of Cala Llonga will undoubtedly know him from the Pha Thoo Thai restaurant in the village throughout the 1990s. They may well recognise his wife and head chef, Pim, and son and waiter, Pon, who turns 18 this month.
Pon was particularly impressive on the day of our visit, with a friend who has a gluten allergy. He knew the contents of every one of the 97 choices on the menu and was able to steer her around every dish that might have aggravated her condition. They are indeed a hospitable and knowledgeable family.
If you don’t require medical advice with your meal and pick up a copy of their free menu, which is on a table outside (alongside your free copy of the Ibizan) you can avail yourself of their takeaway service. This extends from Santa Eulalia to Cala Llonga in the south and San Carlos and Es Canar to the north. If you’re on a budget, you can pick it up yourself for a 5% discount off your bill?
Alternatively, if you want to avoid the washing up involved with a takeaway, why not visit the restaurant and take advantage of their offer of one free Thai Singha beer with every three enjoyed at the restaurant.
It’s perfect for washing down their traditionally hotter red and green curries, or even their 12€ Menu of the Day, although the latter comes with a free drink and dessert anyway.
Opening Hours: 1 -4pm and 7 – 11.30pm hours
Tel: 971 338652
Food & Drink
Hot Hot Hot!
We bumped into a seemingly knowledgeable old chap in a local bar the other day who insisted that this Wednesday 8th July 2015 would go down as the hottest day ever in Ibiza. Now that seemed like a pretty bold claim considering we have roughly 80 years of recorded meteorological data for the island, so we decided that it was time to get our weather caps on and see if the man was right. We first put a post out on the Facebook asking for help, and you lovely people let us know the temperature around the island and how you were coping.
Merit Sunnymeadow was struggling even though she was naked and stuck in front of a fan. Our very own Claire B recorded an indoor 30c with the aircon on. And give a thought for the cleaners, like Karen Gleaves and Nikki Spark who have to do manual labour during this sweatfest. Danielle Mason kindly sent us a picture of the thermometer in San An (42c) and Tito Barreiro went so far to do a little jaunt around the island recording 43.5c in town and 34.5c at the airport.
So we have a 43.5c from field research, what do the official figures say? Most websites agree that the average temperature for this time of year is 29c at the peak of the day. Reports indicate an official high for today of 32.8c, but feeling like 39c with the humidity.
Even if the reports are a little varied, be thankful that you weren’t in Kuwait today as it’s 48.9c or in Death Valley in 1913 when the record high ever recorded hit 56.7c.
The jury is out on whether the old chap was right. On our field research he was, but officially the highest in Ibiza is still 36.6c which we apparently got nowhere near today.
Spain’s heatwave: a survival guide
Experts offer advice for staying safe as temperatures soar above 40ºC in some parts
As a second heatwave continued to beat down on Spain, the National Meteorological Agency (Aemet) issued its latest warning on Sunday: central and south-western Spain are expected to register temperatures of over 40ºC in the coming days, while elsewhere thermometers will crawl up to between 36ºC and 38ºC.
A mass of African air is being blamed for the conditions, which are not expected to relent until mid-July. Until then, experts are recommending the following…
Drink plenty of water, eat light meals, and avoid exercise.
Keeping hydrated is vital to mitigate the effects of the heat, as is avoiding alcohol and energy drinks. It is particularly important to look after babies, the elderly, and the sick. Eat lightly and often, and keep physical activity down to a minimum, taking care to avoid exercising during the middle of the day. Try to wear light clothing, and be careful about high temperatures inside cars – these are some of the recommendations issued by the OCU consumers’ association.
Don’t go out between noon and 4pm
The Health Ministry has warned people to stay indoors during the middle of the day, and not to sleep out in the sun during the hottest hours. If you must perform any outdoor activity, be sure to take steps to protect yourself from the sun and the heat.
Choose the right solar protection
The National Association of Perfumes and Cosmetics (Stanpa) has highlighted the importance of using the right sunscreen to avoid getting burnt, and in the long term, to reduce the risk of developing skin cancer. There are around 300 products on the market, says the organization, adding that it is important to differentiate between face and body creams.
In the summer, be sure to use higher protection factors. The European Commission says the minimum solar protection factor (SPF) is six. It is important to apply creams properly, says Stanpa, suggesting that adults need to spread around 30 milliliters uniformly over the entire body.
Store medicines properly
The Spanish Medication and Health Products Agency (AEMPS) underscores the importance of storing drugs properly. It recommends checking the instructions to establish if pharmaceutical products need to be kept below certain temperatures. In such cases, the best place to keep prescription drugs is the refrigerator. In general, it suggests storing drugs at temperatures of no higher than 30ºC.
Some pharmaceutical products, such as suppositories and creams, are sensitive to higher temperatures. In such cases, “it is relatively easy to assess their quality, because when exposed to excessive heat, the appearance of the product will indicate its stability,” says AEMPS.
Why the heat puts us in a bad mood
As everyone on Ibiza and Formentera is quite aware, it’s damn hot with a nationwide heatwave courtesy of the winds from North Africa. Some people absolutely love this weather, but most of us struggle to cope. The honking of car horns resonate everywhere, people are barging past people in a sweaty mess and even the normally buoyant poodle at home hasn’t moved from his little shaded spot next to the fan. You somewhat expect this in the daytime, but this weather has decided to violate sleepy time and this makes us grumpier than an editor on deadline day.
So what makes us grumpy? Is there a scientific explanation which helps explain why I want to headbutt a camel? I decided to investigate and came across an interesting article in El Pais written by Abigail Campos Diaz which saves me researching much further – which is good, because it’s too bloody hot.
Apparently Hippocrates mentioned how climate can affect people way back in the 4th century. We do know that the normal temperature of the human body at rest ranges between 36c and 37.5c while the skin is around half a degree lower. If it gets any hotter than that, then the body needs to regulate its temperature and does so through the hypothalamus. This little control centre is located in the brain, and balances heat production and heat loss mechanisms by increasing heart rate and blood flow, accelerating breathing, and by getting the body to sweat. This is according to the World Health Organization (WHO) in Health and Global Environmental Change, so you know it’s legitimate. So on the proviso that your hypothalamus is functioning as normal, why are we still grumpy? Abigail has some information:
What happens to our bodies?
Heat stroke, fainting, sun burns, existing diseases that get worse – the news is filled with summer horror stories. But excessive heat also has many other effects that do not make the headlines. Many small children get skin rashes caused by blocked sweat glands. Adults suffer from water retention, especially in the legs, while the loss of sodium and water from excessive sweating can lead to painful cramps. Spending a long time in hot temperatures, especially when standing up, can lead to heat exhaustion.
What happens to our minds?
The heat wave that hit Spain in the summer of 2003 had a number of effects on people’s mental health. Heat increases irritability and triggers more aggressive behaviour, according to research by Barcelona University psychiatry professor Antoni Bulbena and his team, who published their findings in the journal Psychiatric Services.
A study by La Unión health centre in Murcia analyzed data from the emergency room at Román Alberca Psychiatric Hospital over nine years, and matched it with local weather reports. The results were surprising: on breezy days with easterly winds and on rainy days there was a spike in psychiatric emergencies, whereas cases of delirium increased when humidity rose above 60 percent, and obsessive-compulsive disorders grew when temperatures surpassed 30ºC.
Valentín Martínez-Otero, a doctor in psychology who teaches at Madrid’s Complutense University, says intense heat has a negative impact on mood. “It can trigger a feeling of weakness and fatigue, and can also lead to irritability, mood swings and, of course, there is the impact on the quality of your resting hours. When it’s really hot, it is hard to fall asleep, and that increases your overall fatigue and general discomfort during the day, which finally results in a bad mood.”
Thanks Abigail. So we’ve established why we get grumpy, but what are the consequences and can we do anything about it? Back over to Ms Campos Diaz:
Climate change is also linked to rising violence across the globe. Researchers at Berkeley University in California analysed 60 studies from all over the world containing data covering hundreds of years, and concluded that there was a “substantial” link between the weather and conflict. Examples include the rise in the number of domestic violence cases in India during periods of drought, and the increase in incidents of assault, rape and murder during heat waves in the United States.
The paper, which was published in Science, even suggests that high temperatures are tied to larger inter-group conflicts such as ethnic confrontation in Europe and civil war in Africa.
A traffic light for inner peace
Pablo Fernández de Arróyabe, vice-president of the International Society of Biometeorology and a lecturer at Cantabria University, believes the effects of climate on human health are predictable and have a triple component: the potential danger of the climate event in and of itself, the vulnerability of each individual because of their personal and social conditions, and real exposure to this situation.
With help from the GEOBIOMET Group at Cantabria University, Fernández de Arróyabe has developed OxyAlert Beta, a free cellphone application for Android that collects weather data from all over the world, measuring oxygen change in the atmosphere and displaying it as a risk system using the three colours of a traffic light.
“There are three alert levels for hypoxia and hyperoxia (too little or too much O2), and users are asked eight questions concerning their sleep quality, muscular pain and headaches,” he explains.
If the app shows a red light, it means be careful: the heat may be altering you inner peace. Drink a lot of water, use loose clothing and reduce your physical activity.
Frozen in Ibiza
Princess Anna of Arendelle
Where do Snowmen go in Summer? Why, Ibiza of course! I am so excited to announce that myself, Olaf and my beautiful sister Elsa are here in Ibiza! Arendelle was just too cold, so we decided to re-locate to this beautiful sunny island and show Olaf what Summer’s like! Elsa has to keep using her magic on him to re-freeze him though, so he doesn’t melt!
We only arrived a couple of weeks ago, but boy have we been busy! We have had so much fun going to children’s parties around the island to sing, play, dance and have fun with them! It makes our day to see such happy, smiling faces when we arrive and to get lots and lots of hugs and have huge amounts of fun! It’s very hot in our wintry Arendelle clothes, but we’re adjusting to it and think we’ll be here to stay… who wants ice and snow when you can have sunshine and smiles?
We also had the honour of hosting a little party at the Es Canar street party this week and are appearing live at Charlie’s bar in Es Canar every Saturday at around 8pm from late July until early September… come along and meet us! If you’d like us to come to your party, you can contact us via Ibiza Princess and Superhero Parties on Facebook, on the internet at
by email to
or by calling 675055172.
We can’t wait to meet you and make your dreams come true! Well, I have to go now, we’ve a party to get ready for!
Lots of love, magic dust and warm hugs,
P.S… Why shouldn’t you give Elsa anything to look after? Because she’ll just Let It Go!
Too Hot to Tan …
… A Tale To Blow Your Socks Off
Spray Tan? In Ibiza? You’ve been out in the sun too long mate.” and despite the obvious contradiction I can’t say I was too surprised at the comments I received when announcing I’d decided to have a scouse facial. Among friends there was a double level of incredulity that such a service should exist, and that somebody living here could consider themselves in need of it, plus of course the inherent mick taking inevitability of me, a grown man, admitting to a desire to undergo any cosmetic treatment.
Well in jumping those 3 obstacles like an oompah lumpah over a chocolate river, the third is easy. Despite a pretty miserable canvas from which to start, I’ve no problem with male cosmetic treatments—actually I think the more macho term is grooming, an unfortunate choice if you think about it. Anyway, cosmetic, grooming, beautician, whatever you call it, I’ve seen glossy mags in waiting rooms devoted to telling me it’s ok for men to shave, smooth, slather, alter and even cheat what nature provided, and if that many advertisers want to spend that much money telling me it’s ok, then it really must be ok. We rather like advertisers round here.
As to why it would exist in Ibiza it seems that my assumption of lack of access to the sun, though correct as a reason is very much in the minority.
According to the lovely, and as time would tell rather brave, owner of Ibiza Bronceado Spray Tan Luciana Maggio, the prime reason for spray tanning in Ibiza is the tourist who wants to hit the beach ready bronzed and with the benefits the spray tan offers in building a natural tan in what may be a short break in the sun. So the process is step off plane, check in at hotel, have spray tan, hit the beach like a native and without fears of the day 1 ’gringo gambo’ burn, they can return home with a bronze to send the rest of the workplace Verdigris with envy.
Second on the list are people who have trouble tanning safely due to fair complexions, so not surprisingly a lot of Luciana’s clients originate from northern European climes, or those who just prefer to avoid the sun’s UV rays in favour of a dose of DHA.
Third on the typical reasons to be tinted, and where I come in, is that for whatever reason but usually employment, life in Ibiza doesn’t equate to life under the scorching sun. Skipping past my whine-fest of long hours behind a computer screen, the consequences of my lack of solar exposure came to me in a didn’t-know-I-was-that-vane (ok I probably did) Sunday afternoon in June.
Though I have never been anything of a sun-worship-bather, by June I would have normally accrued a healthy brown from regular day to day activities.
It was on this, what was my first afternoon on the beach this year, that the process of undressing had me feeling quite ridiculous—but it was when a passing Japanese tourist tried to harpoon me followed by the establishment of a splinter group of care for cats, big-up the beached beluga, that I decided steps must be taken. I cannot deny the vanity of my caring when I am sure nobody else on the beach did, particularly given this was Aguas Blancas and so we were not short of far more compelling objects of attention, from near naked girls so svelte I lost any guilt for my personal taste for the now very un-pc heroin chic look, to fully naked silver haired males giving shoreline demonstrations of Newton’s gravity and cradle with every stride. So vanity accepted I looked up Luciana’s spray tan service and approached her with my mission improbable, “I’m disgusting, paint me!”
Appointment set and come the allotted time I realise that despite my willingness to participate in the world of the modern ’grooming’ male—we really should have come up with a term that doesn’t also indicate a man who has developed a google app to ensnare and corrupt young girls– my experience of such being limited to occasionally perusing glossy magazines meant I really had no idea how to approach the session—did I have to do anything? What should I wear, or not wear?
When office discussion revealed my colleague’s interest in following suit on the spray tan bandwagon, and his intent on ensuring coverage extended to that body area that will lack any evidence of pigmentation on any self respecting Englishman, his bum, I bought in to this ’no strap lines’ approach as if I was a hard core tanner who thought the skimpiest budgie smuggling Italian speedos the garments of puritan repression. Clearly getting a bit ahead of myself.
Perhaps biased by the clear prospect of some merriment to come, my wife did nothing to dissuade me from my chosen course and so it was that I found myself removing a gown to be standing before Luciana, naked, aside from a single sock.
To set the scene a little more we had chosen a glass atrium in the centre of our house for the treatment. Advantage, not overlooked by neighbours. Disadvantage, the distinct feeling of being in a display cage.
To be honest I doubt the setting had a great deal to do with the hilarity now being enjoyed by my 5 year old son, who I can honestly say,
judging by his literally rolling around the floor laughing uncontrollably, seemed to be finding the spectacle of his father, naked aside for a cock-sock, being spray tanned just about as funny as life could get. He did however manage to maintain composure long enough to start rattling off pictures on the digital camera.
Though under strict instructions from Luciana—”look ahead chin up” etc., – I’m sure I could see my wife from the corner of my eye biting down hard on her lip not to join in.
Luciana was made of lesser stuff and soon caved in to the laughter so that now I was standing, arms aloft akin the angel of the north, naked but for cock-sock, with a 5 year old in fits of laughter, a wife doing her best to hold it back, and my cosmetic practitioner laughing so much she could barely manage to tell me where to bend next. Not quite what I was expecting from a procedure designed to, and I quote from the blurb “Brighten up your day by getting a instant beautiful bronze tan and feel great about your body!” but then I guess it was pretty funny, I seemed to be laughing too.
The effect was well worth being the object of such hilarity anyway. Having followed the all important 24 hour post spray guidelines (no sweating, minimal touching etc.) to avoid streaking, for the first time this year I was able to hold my brown head up high during daylight hours, feeling suitably local.
For a service without humiliation I recommend either, or probably both, of no 5 year olds being present, and no cock-socks.
Luciana travels throughout Ibiza, hotel, home or workplace at a fixed fee. Contact her via her fb page
Children of the 80s
Words & Pictures Claire B
Last Sunday saw the 2nd of the ‘Children of the 80s’ throwback party nights at The Hard Rock Hotel and it didn’t disappoint. Each week 4 dance/pop acts from the 80s/90s do a live appearance, interspersed with classic tunes and videos from the time with performances from the Hard Rock breakdancers.
First on the stage was the original singer from Snap! who quickly got the crowd in the palm of her hand, even before she was joined by a male singer/dancer. Their number one hits ‘The Power’ and ‘Rhythm Is a Dancer’ had everyone singing and dancing along, and before long, their 15 minutes was up. Next was Nottingham-born Eurodance rapper Ice MC who kept the party going for the next 15 minutes. Noticeably, these parties attract people from all over the world and there’s always a bunch of people at the front of the stage who know all the words to the songs and are jumping excitedly up and down when they’re not taking photos or videos. After another video break, Imagination starring Leee John (that’s not a typo – he has three ‘e’s in his name) came onstage, joined by a guitarist and a female backing singer. From my position at the back of the venue, his gold sequined jacket dazzled from the stage and his amazing voice shone out loud and clear, whilst videos from the band performing back in the day (probably from Top of the Pops) were projected behind them. The highlight of the night for me however, were Gala, having been introduced to their big hit ‘Freed from Desire’ and hearing their music a lot in the gay bars in Benidorm in the late 90s. Singer Gala Rizzatto performed with a full band – drummer, guitarist and keyboard player for about 30 minutes and put on an amazing high-energy show, with lots of quirky dance routines with her male dancer when he joined her on stage. Her set consisted of all of her big hits and a couple of more recent songs. Everyone was dancing and singing along, and when the confetti cannons and CO2 jets went off for the finale, that was the signal that the end was in sight and we would all have to return to reality.
If you want to step back in time a couple of decades and dance and sing along to some old classics, it’s a fun night out. There’s a great mix of locals and tourists of all ages, and many make an effort to dress up, as do all of the staff. Each week it is free for Ibiza residents and those in 80s fancy dress. Next week it’s Rozalla, Twenty 4 Seven, Sabrina Salerno and Samantha Fox. Check the website or Facebook page for the weekly line-ups:
A Brief History of Time …
Stephen Hawking wrote a seminal work on cosmology called ‘A brief history of time’. This isn’t quite as good and doesn’t involve any mathematics. Welcome to our series on the history of Ibiza’s clubbing institutions…
Like most all of the clubs in Ibiza, Amnesia was not custom built but evolved slowly over time from an old working farmhouse. The original building was built at the end of the 18th Century and housed five generations of the Planells family. The locals of Ibiza have always been renowned for their generous nature, so it’s no surprise that the owners in a time of no social security often gave away free bread, cheese and figs to the poor and needy.
After a couple of centuries of farming and exporting salt, Ibiza found a new industry. Its beautiful beaches and countryside were visited by the first tourists at some point in the 1950s and Ibiza began to prosper and grow as idealists from all over the world chose Ibiza and Formentera to relax and escape from the stresses of modern life. The Rolling Stones holidayed in San Antonio in 1964 and in 1968, Pink Floyd sound tracked the film ‘More’ – which showcased Ibiza as a paradise for taking drugs and having fun.
With the tourism industry really starting to gain lots of traction in the 1970s, the Planells family decided to end their life in the countryside and moved into town. They sold their house to the fantastically named Maria Fuencisla Martinez de Campos y Muñoz, who unsurprisingly was from an aristocratic background and apparently quite the hippy. The house became a place for art exhibitions and live bands, attracting a creative bunch of people who used the space to experiment with LSD and free love, far away from the more touristy areas near the coast.
In 1976, shortly after the dictator Franco died, Madrid-born Antonio Escohotado rented the house from the lady with the long name for 20,000 pesetas a month (roughly €120 or the cost of a current night out clubbing). He wanted to create a place where people could forget all of their worries and decided on naming the house ‘The Workshop of Forgetfulness’. After finding out that, ironically most people forgot the name, he opted to change to the name that we all know, love and manage to remember.
Amnesia was born and begun to slowly blossom into the space it is today. In the 1980s the partnership of new owner Ginés Sánchez and promotions guru Prontxio Izaguirre pushed Amnesia to the forefront of European clubbing destinations. The club installed a state-of-the-art sound system and a new music policy firmly based around hip-hop, electronic and later house music. Argentinian born Alfredo Fiorito was resident of the club and a pioneering DJ who is credited with inventing the ‘Balearic Sound’ and for inspiring U.K. tourists Paul Oakenfold, Danny Rampling and Nicky Holloway to create their own club nights back in London. People conveniently forget that San Antonio’s West End was also a major source of inspiration as well, but back in blighty, Spectrum, Shoom and The Trip were a huge success and many people credit Amnesia for kick-starting the club scene throughout the rest of Europe.
It was the 1990s that really saw the movement of house music into the mainstream and Amnesia started to get more and more popular as a result. One early resident from 1991 was the legendary Alex P, who regularly dressed up as Batman when on the decks and has so many Ibiza stories that he can’t remember any of them. He personally witnessed the meteoric rise in numbers coming into the club as the British club promoters ‘Up Your Ronson’ and ‘Cream’ started putting on nights in the mid-90s. Current Mambo resident and Ibiza DJ at large, Jason Bye also remembers it well. He was introduced to Amnesia by Mambo boss Javier Anadon in 1993, when they ‘popped down’ after a night at Bucaneros bar in the bay. The then resident, Franco Moliagri was playing Jaydee’s ‘Plastic Dreams’ at the time, which just happened to be one of Jason’s favourite tunes and one that he still regularly plays to this day. Jason managed to score an Amnesia residency of his own running from 1995 to 1998 and was spinning tunes as Cream first started putting on nights.
“I used to close out the Cream Terrace, which was open air and bloody brilliant. All of the workers used to come down and I have fond memories of playing with Kevin Saunderson, Jaydee (he of the Plastic Dreams fame) and Sven Väth. I once almost ploughed down everyone in the club when I decided it’d be a good idea to do a lap of honour on my moped. I went through the main room, then the kitchen, then the terrace before jumping over a wall and scooting off home. I don’t think anyone was injured.”
Towards the end of the 90s, the expansion of Amnesia continued. The club went from four bars to sixteen, from thirty employees to more than two hundred in mid-summer and they started up a magazine, record label and fashion range. Mo Chaudrey, Cream Manager from 2001 until 2009, says that he is so proud to have worked in what he thinks was the best club in the world between 2004 and 2009. “Amnesia had Cream, Cocoon, La Troya and Brasilio, the best creative promoter on the island. The set-up was amazing and the people at Amnesia are like family to me. I view owner Martin Ferrer as a surrogate father and still have some amazing friends there.”
Many of the Amnesia crew from back then are still at the club, but I want to hear more about the Cream years. “I believe that Cream was at the forefront in Ibiza especially with its DJs. We had the number 2 DJ in the world, Paul van Dyk as resident and some of the biggest names at the time. Swedish House Mafia played their first proper show at Cream for Radio One weekend, and I still shudder when I think of the night that Paul played alongside Tiesto. The number 1 and number 2 DJ in the world on the same night…incredible.”
10 years on and Amnesia isn’t slowing down. It still has possibly the most varied roster of nights of all of the clubs in Ibiza and still hosts ‘90s nights Cocoon, La Troya and Cream. The only real changes are the slight enlarging of the VIP section – which seems inevitable in this era of Ibiza – and the sound system which gets constantly upgraded. They’ve even named it ‘Xpanded Amnesia Technology’, which apparently utilizes dynamic digital audio processors that analyse and enhance those frequencies that actually make your body shake and make you feel like being given a sonic massage. Stephen Hawking would be proud.
Mondays – Cocoon
Celebrated German nutter and superstar DJ, Sven Väth started his successful Monday nights at Amnesia in 1999. This was the first real minimal techno party on the island and is still the music’s spiritual home, even if the sound is pretty much everywhere now.
Tuesdays – Together
Together is all about the bass, with stars such as Chase & Status, Pendulum, Mistajam and Andy C gracing the decks. It sounds nothing short of amazing on the Amnesia system, as does the terrace hosted by Defected. Think a little more laid back and housey.
Wednesdays – HYTE
This night is all about the music, with a cracking line-up of old school legends like Robert Hood and Kenny Dope playing alongside emerging stars of the future. Yet again the sound system makes this night, it really is special.
Thursdays – Cream Ibiza
What can we say about Cream? It’s been here for so long because it really is that good. Paul van Dyk and Above & Beyond are bi-weekly residents and the terrace has the best in up-front house music all season long.
Fridays – Music On
Marco Carola’s brainchild has a simple concept – two DJs in the main room, playing long and amazing sets of minimal bangers. Some cite it as the new ‘Cocoon’, we just like it as it is.
Saturdays – Matinée / La Espuma
This is where the Amnesia team have really let their creative juices flow. The afore-mentioned Brasilio had a lot to do with this night in its early days and his legacy is alive and well. Expect extravagant shows on the stage and more foam than at a Gillette factory gone wrong. Paris Hilton is also doing some nights in conjunction with Matinee. Meh.
Sundays – La Troya / House of Madness
This really is one of the brightest and most outlandish nights on the island. Full of drag queens and flamboyant personalities, there isn’t a single area of the club that escapes. You can only expect the unexpected here, no matter which room you are in.
Jungle and Shura
Words and Pictures Claire B
Last Wednesday at Ibiza Rocks was one of the gigs that I was looking forward to seeing this year. Jungle’s summery, funky tunes have been getting a lot of airplay on BBC6 Music which I listen to a lot and there’s been quite a buzz about the band since they released their debut album last year. Support was from fellow Shepherds Bush resident, singer-songwriter Shura, who appeared with a full backing band. Standing on the stage to the left of Shura’s equipment was a plastic pink flamingo, presumably a prop borrowed from the previous day’s Colada Club Pool Party! Whoever was responsible for that, it was a nice touch. She and the band soon got the interest of the crowd that were assembling in the venue and got them swaying along to the soulful music that combined keyboards and jangly guitars and were captivated by her soft and almost haunting at times vocals. She played songs that will be undoubtedly on her first album which is due out soon and a cover of Fine Young Cannibals ‘She drives me crazy’.
Jungle came on just before 11pm to clouds of dry ice and floods of green light. They’re more of a musical collective than a band, instigated by school pals Tom McFarland and Josh Lloyd-Watson who have tried to stay largely anonymous when they perform. And this was obvious from the number of musicians and singers on the stage – 7 in total. Tom and Josh took centre stage, flanked by two singers either side plus a drummer and two guitarists behind them, but they didn’t hog the limelight as they switched effortlessly from playing keyboards to guitars whilst singing. They were accompanied by an amazing light show, which they didn’t really need to enhance the musical experience, but it just added that little extra something to the performance! Their music more than spoke for itself as it wafted around the venue in the hot July night, with funky beats, keyboards, guitars and lots of vocals over the top. They quickly had the whole venue dancing along with them and showing their appreciation. If you weren’t there and get chance to go and see them live, do so.
It was another great pairing of excellent acts on the line-up – something that Ibiza Rocks does exceedingly well. Next week on July 15 are Catfish & the Bottlemen who wowed the crowd here last year when they played a support slot – if you like live, youthful guitar bands, then this is one for you. More info and tickets at:
Café MAMBO 2015 Pre-Party Line Up
Café Mambo is renowned for two things. The first is as a venue for Ibiza’s glorious sunsets, and the second is as a pre-party hotspot. Now that the summer is in full swing, here’s a reminder of what they have on each night of the week—and remember, it’s all for FREE!
Mondays will host Aoki’s Playhouse featuring Steve Aoki and special guests.
Tuesdays will feature Together & Defected In The House, ahead of their roadblocked party at Amnesia, one of the biggest weekly events on the island.
Wednesdays has the Martin Solveig’s My House at Pacha pre-parties.
Thursdays has the return of David Guetta’s F*** Me I’m Famous.
Fridays will host Insane at Pacha’s pre-parties.
Saturdays will feature Bob Sinclar’s Paris By Night in support of Pure Pacha, which will feature exclusive decor and Bob brings a mind-blowing team of dancers.
Sundays sees a variety of events through the evening, of which the return of Solomon+1 ahead of his party at Pacha is one of the highlights.
Cafe Mambo is also planning special one-off events, following the success of the recent Duke Dumont party which you can keep up to date with on the website.
For reservations please contact +34 971 346 638 or
View from the Pew
The Bible is a unique and strange Book. The Bible contains “God’s thoughts” which are strange and yet marvellous spiritual teachings. Among them are paradoxes. A Paradox is defined as a seemingly self-contradictory declaration but is in fact true.
Last week’s sermon theme was about the 1st of the five marvellous paradoxes listed below:
- Strength Through Weakness (2 Cor. 12:9-10)
The Apostle Paul received an abundance of revelation, writing about 1/3 of the New Testament. He encountered many hardships, but the Lord assured him, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Paul replied, “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
We all have weaknesses which God can use to make us aware of our limitations, and keep us humble, useful and dependent on Him!
- Receiving Through Giving (Acts 20:35)
A recipe for happiness is to become a giver. God will bless you beyond what you need so you may have the chance of becoming His channel of blessing!
God Himself is the greatest giver! (John 3:16)
- Exaltation Through Humility (Jas. 4:10)
God has never been pleased with the proud, boastful and over confident. It is by reaching down with a heart of service that we are elevated by the Servant King, Jesus. So the way up… is down.
- Living Through Dying (John 12:24)
The corn of wheat that falls to the ground and dies also grows and becomes productive. This is an agricultural and spiritual principle as well. Death to our selfishness can be the beginning of a life worth living.
- Finding Through Losing (Matt. 10:39)
We try to find the meaning of life in our pursuits, our own philosophies and in trying to enjoy all our things, only to find that nothing on earth really satisfies our soul without Jesus, the essence of life. “You can gain the whole world but lose your own soul” (Mark 8:36) Jesus said, “I have come to give life and give it abundantly.” (John 10:10b)
Services: Sun 12th of July 10:30am in Sta Eulalia – Worship with Communion. ICS Holiday Services: Sun 12th of July 10:30am Communion and 5:30pm Informal Praise at the RC Chapel in Es Canar. ICS Seasonal Chaplain: 638 37 34 79
English-speaking Church in Ibiza and Form, Tel 971343383
It’s Good to Talk
I have an issue with anger, the season really takes it out of me and I get very very busy and stressed, like many others, but I find myself not being able to handle it. My clients all think I’m great and I get wonderful feedback but the thing is I constantly feel on the edge. Then, when I do finally get home, I unload it all on my wife who also works very hard and is at the point where she just can’t take my ranting any more. I know it affects the whole atmosphere and the rest of the family, none of it is directed at them but it still upsets them and I only ever realize afterwards that they don’t deserve it. How to I learn to keep quiet yet manage the feelings I have?
Thank you for your e-mail. It seems as if your behaviour impacts the whole family and I wonder what the root cause of the anger is? As you say, you are very good at work and receive great feedback so why do you feel angry and frustrated? I wonder if you have any outlet for your frustration physically ie. swimming, meditation or any other form of exercise. It’s important that you feel you have an outlet for your feelings, what would it feel like to let your family know that you are aware that you are presenting things to them in a way which creates a negative impact, but you do want to be able to talk to them so how could you phrase things differently so they receive it as you needing support rather than you being angry with them? It could be possible that your anger stems form situations or incidents that happened some time ago and those feelings are now triggered by situations that might not be the same but, non the less, bring out a similar reaction in you. It feels as if you need to spend a little time exploring and understanding your reactions to certain situations and how you can then seek support from those you care about without upsetting them. If you would like to talk about this more then please do come to our Free support group which takes place every Tuesday.
Thursday 9th to Wednesday 15th July
ARIES – The Magician
The arcane message of the Magician reminds us to focus our attention, like a laser, on every aspect of our life. By doing so we’re capable of becoming Magicians, able to create whatever ‘magic’ we want. Some give up on their dreams and aspirations so easily by accepting what others or society tells them is the norm. Follow your truth.
TAURUS – Six of Disks
As much as finances are creating a drain in certain areas, in others you’ll be pleased that there’s signs of financial growth. Money energy is never static so there is no need to feel you are always playing catch-up financially. This is particularly true this week as an outstanding debt is likely to be repaid. Others like what you do.
GEMINI – The Hanged Man (reversed)
You can’t force things to happen or get others to do your bidding this week. If you try to manipulate them for personal gain it will backfire. If you put others first you’ll be surprised at the love and support you receive. Putting physical or material interests first leaves you feeling spiritually empty, so why put yourself through that?
CANCER – Five of Swords
It may be difficult for you to keep a lid on your temper as you discover what’s been going on behind your back. You’ll be pretty upset by the underhanded dealings of others as you’re usually a good judge of character. Sometimes you trust unconditionally only to find you’ve been hoodwinked by a charming attitude. Time to wise up!
LEO – Five of Disks
Someone will want to do you a favour and help with a money matter. You’ve been worrying about what to do about a financial situation; but take heart, things are about to change. Be aware of your thoughts and try not to see everything so negatively. It’s great to have a helping hand, but do something to help yourself also.
VIRGO – Nine of Swords
Worrying about problems won’t solve them. Why not have a good talk to someone you trust, they will offer fresh insights into your situation and possibly a solution. Most concerns might never happen, so why give certain ‘problems’ power in your life? Avoid important financial deals until the end of the month, as all may not be what it seems.
LIBRA – Seven of Cups
Decorate your home, get yourself a makeover, shop ’til you drop. You get the picture? The sensible part of you wonders how you’ll find the funds to do so. Well, the secret to having wealth is not to hoard it, but circulate it in your life; therefore it stands to reason that it comes back to you from others.
SCORPIO – Eight of Disks
There won’t seem that there are enough hours in the day this week as you battle with your work schedule. Yes, it’s great that everything is going so well financially; however it’s not leaving you much time for a personal life or for those you care the most. It will be a balancing act, but remember to count your blessings!
SAGITTARIUS – Four of Cups
Weigh up opportunities this week as there’s a few to choose from both personally and professionally. However, delay any decision on making a firm commitment as there may be another opportunity on the horizon; one you might like even better. Romantically, if you’re single and have kissed a lot of frogs recently, the signs are good to meet your Prince/Princess.
CAPRICORN – Queen of Swords
You’re able to cut through the crap and get straight to the heart of important issues this week and are able to expose others lies or weaknesses with a zeal that borders on ruthlessness. It’s important however, to maintain a sense of humour which air sign women, Aquarius, Libra or Gemini have in abundance; they’re straight talking and insightful too.
AQUARIUS – King of Disks
Have a detached air about you when it comes to making important decisions this week. Being emotional will only cloud your judgement. Don’t budge if you’re negotiating what’s best for you or haggling with someone over finances; playing tough gets you what you want. Earth sign men, Capricorn, Taurus or Virgo prove insightful and in helping you achieve your goals.
PISCES – Four of Swords (reversed)
If you feel like you’re heading down a rabbit hole, don’t panic! Stress will have a physical effect in your body; making you more susceptible than usual to poor health. You need to offload what’s currently bothering you and need some space to get your head together. Consider a quick getaway to recharge and to come up smiling again!
In advance of the 2015 Sh1t Party fundraiser on July 17th, we reprint our 2014 report on the work of a group that are a shining example of community integration and charitable fundraising … Sh1t, we salute you!
As Ibiza parties go, and there are plenty of them, few can claim to be unique. Most follow a relatively standard format. Promotion, music, customers, dink, and at the end of the event somebody gleefully counting profits or weeping over a loss. At first glance the annual Shit party, now in it’s 11th year, ticks the same boxes, but dig a little deeper and you discover that this shit is like no shit you’ve seen before.
First we had better deal with the name – not exactly conducive to feelings of worthiness is it? Our own Bob the vicar deals the profane name by referring to it as the Sh1t party. If the word offends please do follow suit because the last thing they are about is trying to shock or offend.
The origins of the name come from the workers who come to Ibiza every year full of hope and energy, to find a cut-throat world of low-paid and sometimes no-paid jobs with long hours, dodgy conditions, and sardinesque living quarters. Come August, the traditional time of the sh1t party, and the positivity of May has been replaced with the cynicism of Meldrew. Ask them any question, how’s the job? How’s your boss? How’s the apartment? How’s your money? There is only one answer … Sh1t.
It was John ‘Loco’ Moore who first had the idea that a workers blow-out was called for. A party where you could forget about all the sh1t and go crazy. John soon found the support of Julian Cobby, Jay Moore, Peter Duncan and Martin Makepeace as sponsor to hold the very first worker’s lament in 2003.
A turn out of 300 partied the day and night away with a disregard for rules and regulations that would be impossible to conceive in current climes. 2004 found the Sh1t party moving to its home for the next 10 years up to now, Gala Nights (a.k.a The Zoo). Since then Nathan Viva, Ryan Harvey and Carl Williams have joined to form the committee of 8 that organise the event. Growing year on year and soon becoming the ‘must do’ event of every worker with a grudge to bare – i.e. all of them.
So that’s the origins but it is in the philanthropic nature of the party that Sh1t takes on a saintly scent. Lead by a committee of 8 all organisation and promotion is by time given on a voluntary basis. Worth remembering that these are people all at their busiest in the height of the summer season. Ticket sellers receive no commission yet promote the event alongside those that earn their living and even DJs, so often maligned for their rewards, are happy to ply their trade without pay alongside the St Johns’ ambulance who may have a greater reputation for worthy deeds but are no less noteworthy in donating their emergency cover free of charge.
All good people, very good people, but they would be the first to acknowledge their contribution is nothing compared to the real Sh1t heroes. The award for excellence in defecation, the real true poos, the clap for crap has to go to the workers themselves. Despite many having descended to a daily diet of pasatta and pasta, despite working in conditions more Korean than Ibizan, the contribution they have made over the last 11 years has been immense.
Expenses of the Sh1t party are limited to nothing more than the ‘required to operate’ security and bus transportation. Aside from that every penny of the worker’s paid entrance fees goes to the charity pot. So how much does this impoverished youth raise? In the history of the Sh1t party they have raised 30,000€. Pretty impressive huh? But I’m sorry, I am sh1tting you, they raised 30,000€ in one year. Even this year’s party, which was held a few days before payday and earlier than usual, raised a little under 20,000€. I hope that if Sh1t was an offensive term to you at the outset it has just become a little more palatable. I asked Julian Cobby who, together with Martin Makepeace and John Loco, allocate the funds out to charitable causes whether he felt the fundraising of the event was recognised in the community.
“It is sometimes a little frustrating. People have difficulty accepting that somebody isn’t on the make but I guess that is in some ways understandable. This is Ibiza, nobody does anything for nothing, and you have to overcome those prejudices. We ask the businesses in San An and particularly the west end whether they would like to make a contribution. Some are fantastic – too many to mention but people like Linekers and the Highlander have always supported us. Bartollo has been great in allowing us to use the venue without charge. He covers the costs he has, bar staff etc, from the drinks and we keep everything else. Others just have a mistrust that anything can be done by people for nothing. We have even had one or two of the organisations we’ve donated to turn their noses up when we’ve invited them along. It’s just about people’s pre-conceived ideas and that’s a shame, but it is all nothing to the contribution the workers make and the gratitude of those it benefits.“
Julian was quick to point out that the contribution didn’t stop at the cost of a ticket. “The Sh1t party is all about fancy dress and the effort and thought that goes into the costumes is incredible. It blows us all away every year. The originality, the ideas, but also the time and sometimes the cost of putting them together. This year there was a guy who had designed his costume as the egg roundabout. He had built this whole carcass of the egg itself surrounded by a road with cars and bikes on it. He’d even had his face painted as the statue inside. We had a huge group of Simpson’s characters, they came 3rd and by the time of the ceremony all their paint was running down their faces, a real mess, but to all get together like that, brilliant. The winner this year was Daytime Dave who came as Stephen Hawking. He really took it to another level. He had even programmed his Ipad to use as a Stephen Hawking voice box. He didn’t speak all night – just tapped it out on his ipad.”
I asked why he thought the party had held the commitment of the organisers through the years when they were at their busiest. “You have to think of it in terms of being the other side of the fence. I’d much rather be putting the time in to raise money for Caritas than I would be being fed by them. I’m sure all the others think the same.”
Of the 18,500€ raised in 2014 the lions share will go to Caritas to provide for the homeless, several thousand to the cancer charity andnother groups such as 24/7, and the red cross. Some is held back for individual hardship donations such as a computer to help a child disabled in an accident communicate with his friends. So there you have it, Sh1t, it really is not a dirty word.
Poos and Twos …
It seems that number twos are an unavoidable recurring issue in publishing the Ibizan newspaper. In the last few months we have effluent editions aplenty with sewage outpourings at Talamanca, Cala de Bou and most recently Formentera. With a feature in this edition on the Shit party, we thought we would go all out for a stinker special and so in this week’s edition we have included the film that made Cala Bassa famous for all the wrong reasons—Kevin and Perry in which our hapless hero, well we better not spoil it for you if you haven’t seen the movie, and if you have you’ll know what we are talking about. To the right you will find our top plop, fun for all the family in our board game that sends you down the drain, El Emisario, the sewer pipe—a celebration of Ibiza’s inability to keep its dirty business to itself. The rules are simple, land on the wrong squares and you are flushed out to sea and have to start over. Complete the course via the other toilet troubles that await you and you get to ship your faeces off to Mallorca—then it’s their problem. All you need is a dice and you can get flushing!
Kevin and Perry Go
15; 82 min; Comedy, Music; 2000 (UK)
Link at IMDB:
The film begins at the beheading of Anne Boleyn, which turns out to be an erotic daydream, introducing protagonist Kevin, who is having sexual fantasies when he’s supposed to be doing his homework about Boleyn. Kevin has tried lose his Virginity for three years. He and his best friend, Perry go to a newsagent’s to buy a pornographic magazine, which results in failure, as do all of Kevin’s attempts at sexual exploration.
The boys come up with the idea to go to Ibiza to become DJs and get “guaranteed Sex”, but Kevin’s parents Ray and Sheila (James Fleet and Louisa Rix) forbid the trip due to Kevin’s bad grades on his school report. As a compromise however, they tell the boys they can make the trip on the condition that they have to get a job to pay for it. The boys search fruitlessly for a job, ending up at a house party where Kevin again tries to succeed in finally having sex, and again fails.
Having failed miserably at all his attempts at success with women and gainful employment, Kevin is asked to sign for the delivery of his dad’s Credit card. Kevin then takes the card to the bank to steal the money for the flights from his dad’s bank account. At the bank Kevin and Perry’s bumbling somehow results in the capture of a bank robber, and the manager awards Kevin and Perry with enough cash to make the trip. With that, they plan for their vacation in Ibiza. Once in Ibiza, the boys spot the ‘girls of their dreams’ Candice (Laura Fraser) and Gemma (Tabitha Wady). They also meet Eye Ball Paul (whose nickname derives from his practice of vodka eyeballing). The boys spend the day with the girls and although they are unsuccessful at having sex with them, they do begin to bond with them as friends.
That night, the boys walk down the high street filming the events around themselves. Kevin then films a couple snogging which turns out to be Ray and Sheila. Kevin sulks while he and Perry hang out with Ray and Sheila, finally ending up at the club “Amnesia” where they dance the night away. Their new friends, Candice and Gemma are refused entry by the doorman (Paul Whitehouse), citing their appearance as a reason. The next day, the boys go to Paul’s where he makes them clean his house in return for his listening to their tapes. Leaving Paul’s house, they spot Candice and Gemma, but again their clumsy attempts at wooing them end up in failure.
After the girls have a makeover, they are admitted to Amnesia with Kevin and Perry. However, events again conspire to ruin their chance at romance with the girls. Later, Perry videotapes Ray having sex with Sheila. The following day, Paul listens to their music as the boys clean his kitchen. He stumbles across the taping of Ray and Sheila and shows it to everyone, resulting in Kevin ending his friendship with Perry after realizing he was responsible for filming them.
After a day of Kevin and he sulking around unhappily, Perry runs into Paul, who tells him that he likes their song, and that he will play it in the club. Perry tells Kevin the good news and the friends reconcile. That night they and the girls go to the club again. Their song becomes an instant club favourite. Paul becomes unhappy at Kevin and Perry’s success, and turns off the song and makes the crowd angry. Kevin and Perry the take over as DJs with the club dancing through the night. Later that night, Kevin and Perry finally lose their virginity to Candice and Gemma.
In the Epilogue, the boys are seen signing copies of their record in a music shop, whilst Kevin’s parents are seen signing copies of a video they have made about better mid-marriage sex.
Jezza’s Sport Report …
Unfortunately, “heartbreak” was the theme for last week regarding English sports stars.
for the gallant England Women in their quest for the World Cup in Canada, as they were beaten 2-1 by holders Japan with a last minute own goal in their Semi Final. Having trailed to a first half penalty, they dominated the second half and were rewarded with a penalty of their own to bring the scores level but succumbed to an agonising 89th minute winning goal to extinguish any hope of reaching the Final. However, as always, they pulled themselves together to show real character and guts to go out again and beat World No 1 ranked Germany, themselves beaten by the USA in the other semi, in the 3rd/4th place playoff winning 1-0 to sign off from the WC after their amazing showing, ending up as the best in Europe and producing the best performance for an England football team since 1966, with Charlton, Moore, Stiles et al, so well done, ladies, you did the country proud! Meanwhile, the US thumped Japan 5-2 in the Final to make up for 4 years ago when they lost the Final to the ladies from the Land of the Rising Sun. Secondly, in
and heartbreak for two English stars at Wimbledon. Firstly, Heather Watson, England’s No 1, did really well to reach the 3rd Round, beating 2 higher ranked players but then came up against serial winner, World No 1 and top seed Serena Williams. However, totally against form, Watson played incredibly well to be a set all and she had two opportunities to take the final set and the match but just couldn’t quite make it leaving Serena to serve out for the match and a meeting with sister Venus in the next round.
Then, in the men’s, James Ward, hero of GB’s Davis Cup team, took on Canada’s Pospisil, ranked 15, and having reached the 3rd round for the first time, took the Canadian all the way, at one stage being 2 sets to 1 up, eventually losing 8-6 in the final set. Heartbreak for both then, but true Brit grit to get so far and take higher ranked players all the way. Without wanting to be harsh, seems to me that our players, apart from one of course, just lack that killer instinct to go for it when offered the opportunity and need to take advice from the real winners in the sport. Meanwhile, as per usual, Andy Murray is the only Brit to make week 2 and now faces Federer in the semi-finals after beating Canada’s Pospisil in the quarters 6-4, 7-5, 6-4. At least one of Murray’s nemesis’ bowed out early, in the shape of Rafa Nadal, beaten by unseeded German Dustin Brown, complete with his 2′ dreadlocks, and he really needs to take a serious rest and go back to the drawing board, possibly even changing his coach. Not only that, but his loss cost me one half of my ongoing wager with a certain Stevie B, as described in my column last week, but now that the Fed reaches the semis, at least I’ll come out even/stevens! Djokovic faces Gasquet in the other semi-final after Gasquet beat Wawrinka in a five set thriller with the final set finishing 11-9. Last comment, for the ‘mo, on Wimbledon, and a plea from me to the Beeb: please, please get rid of the ubiquitous Balding and her absolutely crappy Wimbledon highlights show at the end of each day.
Regular readers of this column will know my opinion of this woman who just seems to be everywhere at the moment but aside from that, I’ve heard so many people, and indeed, the UK press, saying how bad the programme actually is so I’m not alone. Bring back John Inverdale, please!
After all the pre-Series hullabaloo the real thing gets under way on Wednesday in Cardiff, as England start their quest to grab the Ashes back from those arrogant Aussies, and altho’ Clark’s boys beat Essex in a 4 day warm-up not everything is rosy in their garden.
Firstly, stalwart Ryan Harris, one of their 4 quick bowlers and a dead cert to start, has had to pull out of the tour due to injury, and secondly, their star spinner Lyon was clubbed for loadsa runs and only one wicket by an Essex side that restricted Australia to 212 all out in their second innings. Didn’t help either when Captain Clark was bowled for a second ball duck in the 1st innings! So, all to play for then and let’s hope Cookie can fire his men up to come out, all guns blazing and take the initiative with a win to really set the 5 match series alight!
Still no word from my spy-in-the-camp Jules regarding the Tour de France (don’t know what I’ve done to upset him!!!) so s’pose ’tis up to me to keep you informed as the Blue Riband event started on Saturday in Belgium. With the first stages now well in to the Tour, as it stands today (Monday) German Greipel won the second stage on Sunday, just, with Brit Mark Cavendish slipping in to 4th, who promptly blamed a team-mate and ended up having a row with his manager – good start for him then! Overall leader Swiss Cancellara came in 3rd to keep the yellow jersey, but Brit Chris Froome, seeking his 2nd title, came in 10th, but is handily placed in 7th overall and was happy with his race so far, especially as he gained 1 min 28 secs on his major rivals Nibali and Quintana.
Sorry, folks, but that’s all I’ve got time for at the moment, but at least you’re up to date with the major sporting events. Until next week……………………………….Jezza
British Grand Prix
- Top: 3rd Silverstone win for leader Hamilton
- Right: Williams catch Mercedes napping off the line
- Above: Button “I love this race but it doesn’t love me”
In what many would agree was a much needed adrenalin boost for an F1 season notable for internal indecision and some lacklustre racedays, Lewis Hamilton won an event filled British Grand Prix taking his tally to 38th victories including this his third at Silverstone, and in doing so pushed him 17 points ahead of Nico Rosberg, who remains the world’s fastest stalker, the pursuit champion of Mercedes-Benz.
Hamilton had to pass both Williams after losing the lead off the line and second place at a re-start following an early safety car. But the Mercedes driver fought back to take the lead at the first pit stops.
Rain made for a chaotic end to the race but Hamilton came through to win from team-mate Nico Rosberg and Ferrari’s Sebastian Vettel.
Felipe Massa took fourth ahead of Williams team-mate Valtteri Bottas, Red Bull’s Daniil Kvyat was sixth, Force India’s Nico Hulkenberg claimed seventh and the second Ferrari of Kimi Raikkonen came eighth.
Hamilton admitted the Mercedes’ bad starts had “made the race for the fans” and, as thousands streamed on to the track to salute him on the podium, he said: “Thank you for coming out today and making my whole weekend, I really wanted to do it for you guys. I couldn’t have done it without you. I’m so elated. You can’t imagine how happy I am. I was tearing up on the last lap.”
Hamilton’s path to victory was far from smooth, however, as Massa leapt into the lead past both Mercedes from third on the grid. Hamilton fended off a challenge from Bottas for second on the first lap, at the end of which the safety car was deployed because of a pile-up at the first corner, involving both Lotuses and both McLarens.
Three of the four cars were taken out of the race in one go, with Lotus team-mates Romain Grosjean and Pastor Maldonado appearing to collide and McLaren’s Fernando Alonso half-spinning as he took avoiding action and collecting team-mate Jenson Button, whose car also retired.
Alonso was able to continue, but needed to pit for a new front wing, although the late rain shower helped the double champion beat Sauber’s Marcus Ericsson to finish 10th and score his first points of a difficult year in the uncompetitive and unreliable McLaren-Honda.
At the restart, Hamilton tried an aggressive move on Massa immediately after the safety car line, which indicates the place from which drivers can begin to race and at Silverstone is on the entry to the final Vale-Club corner complex.
But Hamilton overcooked it, ran briefly off the track, and Bottas took advantage and sneaked through into second. Bottas was initially told he could not try to pass Massa, only for Williams to relent and allow them to race. But the Finn could not pass the Brazilian as the two silver Mercedes tracked the two white Williams to the first pit-stop period.
Hamilton was brought in first, on lap 19, and the so-called ‘undercut’ worked perfectly as he produced what Williams technical chief Pat Symonds called a “stunning” in-lap.
A quick pit stop and a strong first lap out of the pits meant that when Massa and Rosberg pitted on the next lap Hamilton passed them before they were back out the circuit.
Rosberg came oh-so-close to beating Massa out – the two cars were side by side as they went down the pits, but Massa had the inside line for the corner where the pit lane rejoins the track and held on to second.
Even worse for Rosberg, when Bottas stopped on the next lap, the Finn rejoined ahead of the Mercedes and although Rosberg overtook him into Turn Four, Bottas got straight back in front through the kink at Turn Five. Rosberg stayed stuck in fourth place until lap 36 of 52 when light rain began to fall.
At first, it hit only the northern part of the track at Luffield, Woodcote and Copse corners but a wobble from Bottas at Copse gave Rosberg the chance he needed and he took third, and then a couple of laps later moved into second past Massa at Turn Three.
The rain, which stopped and then returned with greater intensity over the whole of the track, was bad news for Williams, both of whose cars were passed by Vettel as the teams juggled with tyre choices in the intermittent rain at the end of the race—an unexpected surprise for Ferrari at the end of one of their least competitive races of the season.
- Hungarian Grand Prix, Budapest, 24-26 July
Escape Into Nature…
Well the 2015 season is truly here with opening fiestas and club nights all over the place and party-goers arriving in droves. Ibiza may be famed for its nightlife, but it’s the natural beauty of it that draws so many to settle here or to keep returning year upon year. So, if the partying gets too much, or if you want to do something a bit different, I thoroughly recommend that you escape, exercise, breathe in the fresh air and drink in the stunning views this island has on offer.
We spend a huge deal of our time exploring the island’s hidden gems and a great place to start is the section of coastline overlooking the famous Es Vedrá isle. From here there are several walks of varying degrees of difficulty, but all boasting spectacular surroundings. The first is one we do a lot and it takes you along a steady incline to Sa Torre De Ses Savines, known by some as ‘Pirate Tower’.
To find the car park and starting point, drive up the hill away from Cala D’Hort beach towards Ibiza. There is a crossroads about half a mile later where there are some large rubbish bins by a dirt track on the right. Turn right here and go along the track, then keep going until you reach a clearing where you can park, this is right opposite Es Vedrá.
Once in the car park, take the path directly in front of you through the trees and in around five minutes you’ll emerge onto the cliff top with a breathtaking view of Es Vedrá. Once you’ve drunk it in, taken photos, meditated, had a drink, eaten your picnic or whatever else you fancy, head to the left. The cliff top gives way to a rocky, shrub dotted old footpath leading fairly steeply up at first, then evening out and sweeping around to the right. Stay on this path and follow it gradually up and around until you emerge by the tower. This tower is one of only a few on the island to which you actually have full access so don’t be put off by the rickety little climb up to the entryway! Go in, enjoy the cool air, (sadly the optimistic, positive graffiti once inside which read ‘La felicidad, solo es absoluta cuando es compartida…’ – happiness is only absolute when shared – have since been cleaned off) take in the view from the little square window, then climb the ancient spiral stone staircase which will bring you out at the top of the tower with the imposing Es Vedrá immediately in front of you and marvellous views of Cala D’Hort to your right.
On your way back to the car, be careful not to miss the little goat path down to the hippy cave at the foot of the slope to the far left, almost back on the flat cliff top. It may look like it leads nowhere, but at the end of it you’ll find a beautiful cave which is decorated in all kinds of offerings and contains mattresses, chairs and even a guest book. The cave is maintained by one of Ibiza’s beautifully benevolent souls and he clearly takes pride in providing a quiet space overlooking Es Vedrá. The views from inside the cave are the best on the island, in my humble opinion, and well worth the short walk on the cliff side.